Nearly 5% of the adoptions in the U.S legally dissolve every year. The children may find new homes in the future, but that doesn’t spare them any less suffering.
So, what is the case of children who are no longer adopted? What are the risks that they face? And do they find new homes? That’s what we will explore in the next paragraphs!
Why do people no longer want to adopt their children?
Many reasons drive people to consider un-adopting children. We are not here to judge anyone for dissolving their adoption because it’s hard to decipher the real reasons. However, things happen that drive people to no longer be able to adopt a child.
It can be hard sometimes to bond with an adopted child for many reasons. These reasons are not necessarily linked to the adopted child’s personality or behavior. Reasons like those barely drive parents to reverse their adoption. Sometimes, some external factors force people to do it, which are beyond their control. It’s a hard thing for the child, especially if he/she spent a lot of time with his/her adopted parents, but it happens.
What is the process of reverse adoption?
From a legal perspective, the act of reverse adoption is not very complicated. After all, in the eyes of the law, children who are adopted are the same as biological children. The process of reverse adoption is as complicated as putting a child for adoption. The child will return to a foster-care and society will take care of him/her.
After such a thing happens, the best thing that everyone hopes for an un-adopted child is to find a new home. But, that’s not an easy task, especially for the children.
How un-adopted children react?
Un-adopted children may be shocked by what happened to them. Some of them may develop lifelong self-doubt and low confidence. They think that they are unwanted because of who they are, which is a hard thing for a child to deal with.
The children who face this issue can develop some severe psychological problems, namely depression, and insecurity. The children will find it difficult to trust adult caregivers. They will also try to avoid bonding with people because they might abandon them. This fear of rejection will prevent the child from experiencing intimate human relationships.
How to deal with un-adopted children?
There is no painless way of dealing with a dissolved adoption. However, some measures can be taken to soften the impact on the children.
The best option, in this case, is to confront the child and be honest about what is going to happen. Additionally, parents have to work closely with children’s services and seek a therapist for the child. A psychiatrist will help the child develop the coping mechanisms that will make the matter less hurtful.
How about re-adoption?
Re-adoption is what everyone thinks is the best option for these children. It might seem like that, but it’s not that easy. In many unfortunate cases, the children who are un-adopted suffer from a psychological condition known as Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). This condition happens to older children who suffered from the neglect of their main caregivers.
Although many associations help un-adopted children find new homes, these children who suffer from RAD are not easy to form relations with. This problem makes these children prone to lose their adoptive families again.
What is the solution for un-adopted children?
The reasonable solution is to make the odds of the act of dissolving an adoption happening low. This could be achieved through better screening procedures of adoptive parents. When this area goes through these regulations, the chances of a child losing his/her home will be a lot lower.
Another solution is public awareness. People have to be aware that these children are virtually abused. Thus adoptive parents have to more careful and responsible.
After all, nobody forces anyone to adopt a child. People who do it have to be competent at doing it because it was their choice; they have to take responsibility.
